THE OLDER YOU GET,…
The older you get, the faster the speed of time goes. It accelerates on a curve. When you were 9 years old summer vacation from school seemed like an eternity. When you were 10 you thought back half your life and that seemed like ages ago. Now I’m 38 and months pass like weeks, weeks pass like days, and days pass like hours. It just keeps speeding up and I can never seem to get anything done. I can think back half my life now and it’s 20 years, which seems like yesterday.
I have been so busy that I panic sometimes- how will I ever finish this stuff. The Ph.D. is killing me and I am stressed. I have a film on the table to compose music for, multitudes of problems, some audio work for my business and I just don’t have time for any of it, not to mention my pursuits of pleasure or interest: I have 4-6 music compositions I am writing just for the fun of it- I may never finish them. My to-do list just keeps growing. It’s insane.
I also find that I am in doubt whether I want to continue living in Australia or return home to the U.S. I am seriously considering moving to Los Angeles and “taking a swim with the sharks”. I am thinking of plunging into the music for film market in the heat of the action- that melee that is called “Los Angeles”. At this point I wonder if my Ph.D. studies is taking me closer or farther away from what I really want to do- compose music for motion pictures. All I want to do now is DO. All I want to do is engage in the practice. Fuck theory.
The older you get, the faster the speed of time goes. It accelerates on a curve. When you were 9 years old summer vacation from school seemed like an eternity. When you were 10 you thought back half your life and that seemed like ages ago. Now I’m 38 and months pass like weeks, weeks pass like days, and days pass like hours. It just keeps speeding up and I can never seem to get anything done. I can think back half my life now and it’s 20 years, which seems like yesterday.
I have been so busy that I panic sometimes- how will I ever finish this stuff. The Ph.D. is killing me and I am stressed. I have a film on the table to compose music for, multitudes of problems, some audio work for my business and I just don’t have time for any of it, not to mention my pursuits of pleasure or interest: I have 4-6 music compositions I am writing just for the fun of it- I may never finish them. My to-do list just keeps growing. It’s insane.
I also find that I am in doubt whether I want to continue living in Australia or return home to the U.S. I am seriously considering moving to Los Angeles and “taking a swim with the sharks”. I am thinking of plunging into the music for film market in the heat of the action- that melee that is called “Los Angeles”. At this point I wonder if my Ph.D. studies is taking me closer or farther away from what I really want to do- compose music for motion pictures. All I want to do now is DO. All I want to do is engage in the practice. Fuck theory.
posted by Jaedyn at 10:07 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home